18 Week Appointment and Old Wives Tales

I went in for my regular, monthly checkup on Friday. It was really nice to be able to hear the heartbeat, which was beating away in the 150's. This point brings me to a question and the validity of old wives tales. They, whoever "they" are, say that the faster the heartbeat, the more likely it's a girl, the slower, the more likely it's a boy. Okay, great, but ummm, what's fast and what's slow? So far Baby Muppet's heartbeats have been 125, 177, 168, and 150's. So are all of these above the line for a girl, or below the line for a boy and what's the magic line number?

What about the old wives tale about where you carry a child? Some say the lower you carry a baby, the more likely it's a boy, the higher the more likely a girl. What does this have to do with anything regarding the sex of the baby? I mean seriously, where in medical science can this be found? At least with the heartbeat tale, there is some truth that can be found. My friend Julie tells me that AFTER the baby is born, girls tend to have slightly higher heartbeats than boys.

What about the all important cravings test? So you're telling me if I crave sweets, it's bound to be a girl, but if I crave salty foods, it's a boy? Awesome, but I already have a sweet tooth, how exactly am I to determine if it's my sweet tooth that's the culprit instead of Muppet? What if Muppet really only likes chocolate chip cookies, I have figured it out- yep that's it. This is finally the excuse of the year, I'm sorry Dr. I know you said to gain only 25-30 pounds, but the baby MADE me put on an extra 20! Watch out Chips Ahoy, I'm coming to the grocery store, so stock up!

Finally, my all time favorite. You are supposed to pee in a cup and mix in some Drano (no unfortunately I'm not kidding). If it turns green, baby Muppet is a girl and if it's a boy you can expect some blue Drano. So let me get this straight, how exactly is your urine different if you are carrying a boy versus a girl. Don't you think that if this myth were true, that our enterprising pregnancy test makers would have already come up with a pee stick to determine at the time of a positive pregnancy test what sex you are having? If they came up with that test, they would make a lot of money. I would have already bought 3 or so by now.

All I have been able to determine is that these old wives tales are just that. . . tales, myths, non truths. They are all designed to make me wonder with anticipation and wait patiently until we get our ultrasound- which, yes, I know can be wrong or Muppet won't participate. Hopefully by March 13th, one week and 3 days from now, I'll be able to report whether we are Team Blue, Team Pink or Team Green (if the baby doesn't participate). Either way, God has given Chris and I a wonderful, miraculous, and astonishing blessing. It just doesn't get any better than this.