Knoxville Family Shower

They say you can't pick your family, but I'm here to tell you that you can. You absolutely can pick your family, and boy have I picked the cream of the crop. Chris and I drove down from our nation's capitol to Knoxville in late June for my baby shower. This shower was given by 3 of the most amazing, generous, fantastic mothers I have the privilege of knowing. They are such close friends of my mom that I call them Aunt Kitty, Aunt Clyda and Aunt Becky and if I have my way so will Carragan.

A bright Sunday afternoon brought us to the home of my Aunt Kitty who had placed a wonderful and scrumptious display of food on her dining room table- a food table fit for a queen! There were fruit skewers, a wonderful chicken and rice casserole- need to get the recipe for that one, bread and so many yummies I can't even name them all. My three wonderful hostesses had it all together and thought of everything, it was an elegant shower thrown by some of my very favorite people. It was a wonderful day- I was able to see people that I haven't seen in quite a while and get to spend some time with each one of them. That's really what meant so much to me- was the ability to spend time with my family in such a wonderful, beautiful setting.

I hope you enjoy some of the pictures that Chris took, yes Chris. He was in attendance. I think it was a nice time for him to see those family members too. I'd also like to say thank you to Carla (Chris' mom) for making the trek out to Knoxville for my baby shower. Without further ado. . ..

32 Week Picture

Since I couldn't upload this to the Summer Vacay post, I thought I'd create another one specifically to upload it. So without further ado . . ..

Our Summer Vacay

Every year Chris and I try and take a summer vacation. We started off by travelling to Jamaica for our honeymoon and since then we've been very lucky to be able to travel to St. Lucia, the US Virgin Islands, the Bahamas, and Mexico. Well this year because we are expecting a precious bundle of joy (and the swine flue outbreak), we decided to stick close to home. This year we went to Virgina Beach. I was 32 pregnant weeks at the time, so I've included my 32 week picture in with our vacation pictures as well.

The mini vacation was awesome. Our vacations are always a time for Chris and I to be able to reconnect and spend some quality time with one another. Our lives are so busy with work and the baby coming that this vacation was a special one. It was the last vacation we will go on as a twosome before baby makes 3.

We got to VA beach on Friday and stayed until Sunday afternoon. We rode a surrey bike along the boardwalk, ate several nice dinners, played in the ocean and sunned by the pool. All in all, it was a nice mini vacation and a way to get away from the beltway here in DC. Hope you enjoy the pictures.

DC Baby Shower

Three of my most creative, lovely and best friends a girl could ever ask for threw me a baby shower here in the nation's capitol. The theme of the shower was a candy or sweet theme. It was so pretty. I had personalized pink and green napkins that said Baby Carragan, it doesn't get any sweeter- a play off of my blog, I had the best dessert in the world with Oreo balls- thanks Julie for introducing me to those, now I'll never get them off my hips, and all of this was complete in the most beautiful setting- my friend, Jessie's house. Patra, Julie and Jessie really outdid themselves with my shower. The food was amazing, the drinks to die for, and the setting was a day of girlie fun. There were pink drinks (awesome punches), hashbrown casserole, pecan encrusted chicken, salad, brushetta and so many other yummies, I couldn't even name them all. And to add to the fabulousness of it all- guests were able to leave with gift bags that they could fill to their hearts (or stomachs) content with all sorts of CANDY and really what girl doesn't want a bag full of candy? Thank you Julie Shutley, Jessie Juarez and Patra Stephan (soon to be Wroten) for making me feel very special and for such a lovely shower day. You really outdid yourselves and I am eternally grateful for all you have done for me.

People say the darndest things.

So Chris and I travelled to Blacksburg, VA. I was roughly 32-33 weeks pregnant. Anyway, we were at the mall and I was showing my mom my hands and telling her that it really bothered me that I couldn't wear my wedding rings anymore. In fact, we were shopping for shoes since the ones I currently owned didn't fit on my fat feet anymore due to the excessive swelling my new shape has taken on. This woman approached me and asked if I was okay, to which I replied, yes I am, thank you for asking. She then repeated the question and asked if I was sure I was okay. To which, I replied again, yes I am okay thank you for asking. I thought briefly to myself it was a little weird that some stranger would randomly ask if you were okay, but brushed it off to nice, country, Southern people.
Then the lady asked how far along I was. I said I was about 32 weeks and had approximately another 2 months left. And NO JOKE, this woman blurted out "And you're already that big." To which, my sassy mouth replied "yep and I've still got 2 more months to grow."
Which brings to me to the question- what is it about pregnancy that people (who don't know you, know of you, know your name, or anything about you) think that they can say something about your appearance. While there is a baby growing in there, you are still commenting on someones weight. They wouldn't do that if someone were overweight, why do they think they have the permission to do that if someone is pregnant? What is it about pregnancy that makes people think it's such a public thing, when it fact, it's a very intimate, private thing?
It never ceases to amaze me what comes out of people's mouth. It's like the person who comes up and touches your belly. Now, don't get me wrong, I don't mind if people touch my belly as long as I at least know your name, otherwise, it's still my body, it's still my tummy. . . and apparently it's my big tummy. I truly have no problem with belly touching. In fact, it's really nice when people are able to actually feel Carragan moving, but someone I don't know from Adam's house cat coming up and touching my belly- well that's where I draw the line. I've often been temped to tell the belly touching person (who I don't know) "if you touch my belly, you'll be pulling back a stump." But that seems overly excessive and really rude, so I plaster a smile on my face and pray to the Lord that He gives me patience for these people who just want to be involved and probably don't realize that it does bother some people. And frankly, those are the people who are most likely going to give up their seat on the metro for you, or give up that nice bench when you are just about out of wind from walking so much. Perhaps, I should be a little more tolerant of the belly touchers, but the weight commenters, I just cannot get used to. Whatever happened to the old adage, if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all?

50

50 is the number of days left until my due date. This pregnancy has flown by on one hand, but crawled and eked by on the other.

50 days- how on Earth did I get to only 50 days left? There's so much to do to get ready for a permanent addition to the family. Chris and I are getting our baby furniture in today and we are very excited about it. Carragan will have a bed to sleep in and an armoire in which to store her clothes. You can physically get ready for the baby to come. You can buy the furniture, get her room all set up, wash and hang up those little clothes, and get bouncers and swings ready and in place. But how ready are you really? Physically, you can check off that box, but what about mentally and emotionally?

Mentally, how do you prepare for a permanent family member? Emotionally, how do you prepare for the tremendous amount of love and devotion you are going to pour on this little person who has come into your life. One of my most favorite memories came after the birth of one of my best friends' daughter. Our very dear friends, Mike and Julie, were expecting their first baby. We did everything with Mike and Julie from dinner about 3 times a week to getting down and playing a massive amount of cards and board games. We were and are the very best of friends. And you get to know those friends on a certain level, but when I walked in that hospital room after Addison was born and saw the love and adoration in Julie's eyes for Addison, it really struck a chord with me. It was a different side of Julie and Mike than I had ever seen. But what an amazing memory it is.

So how do you prepare emotionally for a baby- unless you already have a child, you can't imagine how much love, adoration, pride and awe comes pouring out when that baby gets here, how you would willingly give your life to protect that of your child. Or that you would do everything in your power to give that baby everything within your means. Or drop down like an avenger if someone dares to hurt your baby.

And I'm sure parents take tons of time to simply stare at their baby knowing that's something you and your husband created and get to raise, shape and mold. Knowing that beyond a shadow of a doubt that God has given you the most perfect person in the world to raise and love.

So can you emotionally prepare for your baby's arrival- no. I don't think any first time parents know just how much your heart can stretch with love for your newborn child. Chris and I are getting more and more excited about Miss Carragan's impending arrival. We are trying to prepare physically for her arrival but knowing that her arrival could be 50 days away and knowing that she will be the most loved, cherished, and wanted baby. . . well it just doesn't get any better than that!

Birthing Classes

So last Tuesday night (and every Tuesday night for the next 5 weeks) Chris and I had our very first birthing class. We got to meet our teacher and meet other pregnant couples in the class. There's a feeling that goes along with meeting other pregnant women, like you have an automatic kinship with them. You are going through the very same things they are and usually at the same time. You scope out the room wondering if any of the other couples are like you and want to be your friend. It was such a surreal experience.

Last week our instructor talked about breathing and relaxation techniques, which was really nice of her, but totally and completely unnecessary- for me at least. Because you see, I'm getting drugs and lots of them. I have no need for breathing and relaxation techniques, because I won't be using them. I'll be using the tried and true method of the epidural or spinal block, or whatever stops the excruciating pain. In a recent conversation with my sister, she had the most intelligent way of putting natural childbirth. . . WHY? Why have a natural childbirth, you don't get any more points at the end of the birth than if you went with an epidural. This is not to say that a natural childbirth isn't an experience within itself, but for me and my labor, I prefer the epidural.

If I hadn't been firmly ensconced in the the epidural camp, that remark from my very knowledgeable sister would have put me in the will accept drugs camp. I feel no need to prove anything to anyone or be superwoman. While I have yet to give birth, I'm sure the pain experienced by the woman is much more intense than described in books or retold by those who have gone through the process. And let's face it, I don't tolerate pain well. The good Lord has seen fit that Western medicine and the epidural has been invented for people like me, who don't want to verbally abuse my husband, and every nurse and doctor entering any laboring woman's room.

Tomorrow's class is expected to be an extension of the breathing and relaxation techniques. I'll be there to listen and pay attention and maybe even participate, but when do we get to the class where they talk about the drugs to be offered? That's the one I'll be sure to pay extra close attention at. Until then, Chris and I will be making friends with the other pregnant couples, continuing to bond as a couple before baby makes 3, and enjoying these last few days of pregnancy. It really doesn't get any better than this.

She's still a girl!

Chris and I went on Friday night for an ultrasound to see baby Carragan. She just keeps getting cuter and cuter, if I do say so myself. But a funny thing happened at this ultrasound. We figured out just whose child she is- I'll let you guess. When the tech started the sonogram- there she was, head down, facing my spine- and wouldn't move. No matter how much that tech wiggled, poked, pushed, prodded that wand on my belly- Miss Carragan wasn't having any of it. Fearing that this would be the case since she acted like that the last ultrasound, I tried to come prepared for this one. I drank a bunch of orange juice, drank a half of a diet Dr. pepper- but nothing. She is obstinate child. So if there is any doubt about whose child she is- I'll give you a hint- and it's not me- she's as stubborn as her daddy.

And did I mention, she looks exactly like him too? Chris and I sat there and marveled at how much she looks EXACTLY like him. She's got his face shape, his nose and his mouth. There's not much that looks like me- maybe she'll have my dimples or my blond hair, but I sure hope she has his eyes and eye lashes.

The technology of the 3D and 4D ultrasound is simply amazing. It's almost as if you are looking at an actual picture. It gives us a window into her little world-a little peek- just to see how she's doing and what she looks like. It helps tide us over until that glorious moment when she decides to come and join us. That moment is less than 11 weeks away- provided she's on time. Until then, seeing this baby on ultrasound, seeing that she looks just like her daddy and knowing it's 11 weeks until she comes, well it just doesn't get any better than that. Enjoy the pictures!!

What's in a Name?

Before getting pregnant, I often wondered what some parents were thinking in naming their children. We've all heard those stories about the woman who named her little girl Female (pronounced Fa-maul-e), or the woman in Louisiana (Mary- see what your state produces :)) who had twins and named one Unique Lee and the other one Sincere Lee. Or what about the woman who named her son Nosmoking (pronounced Nos-mo-king) but it's spelled No Smoking!

There's so many facets that go into naming a child. You don't want to give them a name that could get twisted into something mean or spiteful, or that other children could use as ammo to invite jokes from their peers. And you don't want to name them something where their initials spell out a curse word or, even worse, just name them some of those listed above. Children make fun of other children for even the smallest of things, so why even add that burden to your poor child (like the old song by Johnny Cash - A Boy Named Sue)?

So when Chris and I sat down and tried to come up with names that we both liked, it was really difficult. Frankly, it was one of the more difficult decisions we've made. This name will be attached to her for the remainder of her life, and we wanted it to be a good, strong name.

Before I go any further, you should all know that Chris wanted to name her Tennessee. That was pretty much a no-go for me from the beginning.

It went both ways, too. There were name that I loved, but Chris hated. So coming to a consensus was pretty difficult. You have 2 very different people with 2 very different ideas, all the time trying to compromise on such an important decision.

So in the end we decided on name, which I'll hope you love as much as Chris and I do. So without further ado - we present to you Miss Carragan Geneva Arnold!!!

Super Stomach Sunday

Chris was able to fix the computer so as promised, here are the week 25 pictures. This belly has a mind of its own!

Time- what a funny concept

Is it possible for time to fly by yet stand still at the very same moment? In my previous blog I stated that I only had 92 days left before my due date. When you put it like that, 92 days doesn't seem like a lot of time, but when you say 1 week from tomorrow, I begin my 3rd trimester, now that seems like a lot of time left. Especially since those 3 months will be in the heat of the DC sticky, nasty, humid, hot summer.

It seems like it's been forever since we found out Muppet is a girl- it was only 7 weeks ago. And it seems like forever since we've ordered her crib furniture- which would only be 3 weeks ago. If you'd like to see what we ordered, click this link- http://www.munirefurniture.com/oldeworld_02.htm

And when I say I'm only 27 weeks pregnant and I've got all the way to week 40 to go, that also sounds like a long time. But when I say I've only got about 13 weeks before Muppet arrives, that doesn't seem so long.

We all know Chris is a compulsive list maker- it makes him more organized and in turn, makes me organized as well. Anyway, the compulsive list maker has compiled a list a mile long of "we need to do before Muppet gets here." Well 13 weeks all of a sudden doesn't sound so long.

So is it possible that time can stand still and fly by at the same time? The answer is YES, yes it can. Or at least I believe it can. I can't wait for the furniture to get here, put Miss Muppet in her crib- it won't get any better than that.

Are you ever prepared?

Ever since my miscarriage, I have been on a personal quest to find out anything and everything about reproduction, why the miscarriage happened, what could be done to prevent another one from occurring (the answer is not much) and other general health related and reproduction questions.

What I learned is that there is a wealth of knowledge out there on a variety of topics related to reproduction and having children. So, off I went to the book store where I have purchased (or friends have been nice enough to loan me) What to Expect When You Are Expecting; Your Pregnancy, Week by Week; Your Baby's First Year; Becoming Babywise; and Happiest Baby on the Block, among many others.

Obviously I read What to Expect When You're Expecting and Your Pregnancy Week by Week as it corresponds with my pregnancy. But recently I've begun to read more parenting style books such as Becoming Babywise and Happiest Baby on the Block. In fact, Chris has even gotten into the spirit and is about to read- New Father- A Guide to the First Year.

But this brings me to a question- how prepared can you actually be? I can read and read and read until I'm blue in the face. I can read about different parenting methods, I can read about putting your baby on a schedule or how to sooth her, or how to swaddle and diaper. I can read about developmental progress and expected milestones. But right now, these are all just words to me. All words and no action. Am I going to be prepared if I read these books, or am I to read them only to find that the words get lost in the mix, shuffle and probably a little chaos of having a newborn?

You go through life in a constant learning cycle. You are taught at a very young age, if you want to know more about a topic, pick up a book and read about it, learn about it, soak it up into your mind until you are able to master whatever knowledge you are seeking. At least that's what my parents encouraged me to do- sustain self sufficiency and learn about it. But how much can reading about an abstract thought and theory help you when your practice is another 92 days away (my due date is only 92 days away, I can't believe it!)?

Chris and I must have been cut from somewhat overlapping cloths. While Chris is very laid back, and I, not so much, we both have a constant thirst to know more, to figure out more, to become very proficient in whatever knowledge we are seeking. I think you feel less stressed the more prepared you are, or at least I do. I know whenever a big test rolled around or an important project is due at work, the more I've prepared, the better I feel. Will having a family yield those same feelings. By that I mean, the more I read, the better prepared I'll be, the more successful I'll be as a parent? Or is it really just Baptism by Fire, trial and error, feeling it out as you go along, after all like my momma says, babies don't come with instruction manuals. And if they do, please let me be first in line to grab my very own copy.

Take for instance the book Becoming Babywise- which I'm almost finished reading. The basic premise is placing your baby on a schedule. This schedule has some built in flexibility, but the book promises if you are able to achieve the feed, wake, sleep routine throughout the day, your child will be sleeping through the night by 8 weeks. I know several parents who have used this method and it's worked for them. I think my sister (the ob/gyn) recommended this book and she used it with her children). And if I'm not mistaken, my cousin did too, and her children were sleeping through the night earlier than 8 weeks. Then again there are friends of mine here in DC who read the book, hated the method and say it doesn't work at all. (This book is highly controversial and there are so many varying degrees of support and opposition for this book.) So are these different methods a one size fits all or do you pick and choose from the different methods- what works for you?

And how hard is it to place a newborn on that rigid of a schedule. I know when a good friend of mine had her baby, the baby would fall asleep during feedings, which violates the feed, wake, sleep routine. Is a schedule as easy as the book makes it out to be or is it one constant struggle?

At any rate, learning as much as I can about the changes, both BIG and small, that are about to occur in our lives at the very least, makes me feel more prepared. And doesn't that count for something? Does feeling prepared help you become a better parent, or are you going to be as nervous and scared as everyone else? Whatever happens in 92 days from now, I'm sure Chris and I will be just feeling it through, taking it day by day, perhaps armed with some knowledge, perhaps not. But knowing that we are first time parents and seeing Muppet for the first time, well it just can't get any better than that. 92 more days until our practice comes!

Broken Computer

I have belly shots ready and set to be uploaded, but wouldn't you know it. . . . we have a virus on our brand new computer. So as soon as we (really Chris) gets that fixed, I will post those belly shots. I promise, and I'll get back to the Super Stomach Saturdays soon.

One of my favorite sentiments

When you come across something truly meaningful, you have to take the time to analyze it and strip it down to rawest of feelings and then put those feelings back into your heart. I saw this online today and it struck me. I stripped it down to it's very core and at mine- I can't wait to see my beautiful baby- the one who has been kicking me, punching me and who, in time, will be lecturing me. Less than 15 weeks to go until the sentiment below will be burned and etched into my heart forever.

"When it is time for your very first snuggle with your very own baby-savor the moment. It's one of the most magical you'll ever know and once it passes, it's gone, never to be duplicated. You may be weary and shaking or wired and floating as you gaze for the first time into the eyes of this tiny stranger whose heart has been beating in concert with your own for the past nine months. Your baby knows you, your voice, your smell, and wants nothing more than to be cradled close in your arms, held snugly to your breast. Lying with your newborn, there is no pressure to perform, no words to be said, no expectations to be fulfilled. For this little while, this too-brief moment, you can finally rest and allow yourself to simply be. The person you were, the woman who didn't know her own strength and doubted her capacity for love is slipping away now, though it may be a while before you truly believe that she's gone. Try to catch her eye as she leaves, and thank her for taking you this far. Everything you'd dreamed and all that you feared is behind you--and in front of you. You're a mommy for real now. You're a warrior. And this is what it means to be reborn."-Sheri Lynch (Hello, My Name Is Mommy)

It really doesn't get any better than this.

Ummm, where did my feet go?

Have you seen them? I have looked all around for them and I can't find them. Seriously, I was getting ready to go out on Saturday, putting on my makeup, and looked down to see how bad of shape my tooties were in (Chris and I were going to the Melting Pot for our delayed anniversary dinner, and I wanted to be sure to have pretty feet) and my feet were nowhere to be found. When did I lose my feet? Where ever could they be?

As if that wasn't enough (losing sight of one's feet can be an extremely traumatic feeling) painting them (after I found them -that is-) proved to be even more difficult. You see, I can't just bend over anymore to paint them- I painfully realized that AFTER THE FACT. Instead, I had to sit down on the floor, twist myself into a pretzel, stick my leg out to the side, just to get sight of my feet and what transpired after that- the people in the nail industry would be HORRIFIED to learn.

I tried to paint my toenails, I truly did. I had this beautiful pink color (since I was wearing a pink dress) to put on my tootsies (OPI- It's all Greek to me- I highly recommend it) all ready to go. I was ready to paint my toenails, but it wasn't just the nail that got the paint, but really more of the whole toe. It looked like I asked a preschooler to paint my toenails. In fact, I think the preschooler might have done a better job staying in the lines. I had pink nail polish from one end of my feet to the other. I had it on top of my feet, on the bottom of my feet (how I managed that, I'll never know) and on the sides of my toes. If you would have looked down at my feet, it would have looked like I had GIGANTIC toes because of the polish on the sides of my toes. It was even so bad that at one point, I just had to laugh. Because I knew that no matter how bad they looked, no matter how much I painted my toes, I was going out looking exactly like that. I couldn't twist myself anymore to get the paint off of my toes, and frankly that was just too much effort.

I think the moral of this story, is why do your toenails yourself? I mean really- it's quite easier to put one foot in front of the other and walk or drive yourself to the local nail salon and let someone else paint your toenails. I know for a fact, my toes would have looked much better if I had, they don't have to contort their bodies to reach your toes. And I would have probably saved half of my bottle of paint. As it is, I have cute little pink paint splatters in my bedroom, bathroom and everywhere else I trod that night. It's even in my shoes- oops, guess I put on my shoes too early.

So to add to the pregnancy related symptoms- put me squarely in the I can't see my feet column. While my belly is getting bigger and making it harder for everyday functions, I can't wait to meet our precious Muppet. It really doesn't get any better than that.

Life happens

First of all, I'd like to apologize for not writing sooner. I had a big project at work which had to be turned in by this past Friday. Now that it's over, I can finally breathe and take a few minutes to chat.

It's really funny how life just happens, how your choices and past experiences shape who you are today and how you presently live your life. With this pregnancy, I have had several "milestones" that I reach where I become more and more comfortable that this is the child God has intended for Chris and I to raise, love and cherish. Those "milestones" come infrequently but are so important to look forward to, to strive for. I have already reached several of these "milestones," for example, when I went for my very first ultrasound and saw the heartbeat, or when I went for a Dr. appointment and heard the heartbeat on the Doppler, and when you go in for your anatomy scan and see that precious baby growing right on schedule. And now I have another one coming up. Week 24, which will happen on Saturday, will be what those in the miscarriage and loss community affectionately call V-Day. This is when a child who is born preterm, at or after 24 weeks, has the potential to survive outside the womb. If a baby is born any earlier, the chance of survival is almost nil.
So all of us in the loss community strive for this day and celebrate it. We celebrate that we have made it this far. We celebrate our desires to have a healthy, full term babies, but know if the unthinkable happens, we have reached this "milestone" and this baby has at least a fighting chance for survival.
It's funny to look back and realize how past experiences have shaped your life. Everyone has friends and family whose first, or any pregnancy for that matter, resulted in a beautiful, healthy baby. Their "normal" is- I get pregnant, I have a baby. But unfortunately, this is not my "normal." My normal, is I get pregnant and worry that this baby isn't going to stick around- that something is wrong. My normal is holding my breath every time I go to the Dr and begin to freak out a little if it takes even the smallest amount of time to find Muppet's heartbeat, or analyzing every little cramp or twinge. My normal is to worry, incessantly. My normal is looking forward to those "milestones" and praying to God that I can reach them. My normal is knowing that just because you are pregnant does not necessarily guarantee that you will have a baby 40 weeks later.
There is not a day that goes by that I don't think about my first pregnancy and wonder about my baby. I consider myself a mother of not just Muppet but to her brother or sister who isn't with us now. I have one angel baby and one currently kicking in my tummy. Perhaps this is coming on the heels of total realization that I have surpassed my original due date. I told Chris this weekend that if we had not had a miscarriage that baby would be here now. None of this is to say that I'm not excited about Muppet and her impending arrival, because Chris and I are beyond thrilled and blessed that she is coming, but there will always be a part of me who will wonder, what our first baby would have done with his/her life. Would he or she been the President of the United States or discovered the cure for Cancer, been a missionary, a doctor, lawyer or in the entertainment business? Would it have been a he or a she? All of these questions and answers, and the subsequent loss and pain, play a significant role in my every day life. . . what MY normal is.
Everyone has a normal, mine just happens to be a different shade of normal. I wonder if my normal will get any easier with subsequent pregnancies? I wonder what my normal will look like after Muppet gets here safe and sound? Since I have been able to feel Muppet kick on a daily basis, it gets a little easier to take a deep breath and know that she is okay. But those in the loss community always have a different color of normal. Life will never be the same for me as it is to those who have never experienced a loss.
But to be thankful for how Muppet is progressing now and to be blessed by God by giving her to us to raise, well it just doesn't get any better than that.

Guest Appearance

Just wanted to update you all and let you know to expect a guest appearance this weekend. I hope this finds everyone safe and sound and having a wonderful week.

love to you all,
Carrie

My favorite part of the day

I can understand why "they" say the second trimester of pregnancy is the best of all. You don't have to deal with the yucky symptoms of the first trimester like morning sickness or the tiring ones of the third. The second trimester is where you get to sit back and finally enjoy the pregnancy. In the second trimester you get to find out if you are Team Pink or Team Blue, you get to see that baby on the screen and see how he/she is progressing and growing.
But the best feeling of the second trimester is feeling Muppet kick. Yes- it's still Muppet, we haven't been able to come up with a name yet. My favorite times of the day is in the morning when I wake up and she's kicking me and right when I go to bed and she's kicking me. I know it's her saying "I'm okay Mommy, I'm in here having fun." It's the best feeling in the world to feel something that Chris and I have created move, wiggle, kick and punch. One of my best memories so far was just last night in fact. I was laying on the bed and Chris came and laid beside me and put his hand on my belly because she was moving. A few minutes later came a swift kick to my abdomen and Chris was like "Holy Cow, your whole stomach moved." She was really having herself a party. . . a dance party at that. But I didn't care. It's the most wonderful feeling in the world.
I love those instances when I get to just spend time with her, feeling her move, talking to her, singing to her. I never knew how much love could well up for someone you haven't met, someone you've never seen, someone with which you've never had a conversation. But I do. I think God stretches your heart to make room and include the most precious gift He could have ever given a mother. Holy mackerel, I'm a mother. She's not here yet, but I am already her mother.
Feeling her kick, punch and wiggle her way through this pregnancy, spending time with her, seeing the awe on Chris' face when he feels her move, well it just doesn't get any better than that.

Oh Boy, Oh Boy, Oh Boy

We're having a GIRL!! We went in on Friday for our 19-20 week anatomy scan, to make sure baby Muppet was growing on schedule. I was lying on the bed praying that Muppet was healthy and happy. The tech came in and began small talk, all the while, in my head I'm screaming- don't care about the weather or how cold it is, I NEED to know that this baby is OK. She then asked if we wanted to know the sex- to which I promptly replied "YES, but I already know the sex." She said "Well what do you THINK it is." Confidently I replied "It's a boy!" Chris immediately filled in the details of his family demographics that out of 10 siblings, 1st cousins and one nephew only 1 is a girl. I often wonder how Jill was able to put up with all of those boys! Jill- you are an inspiration!!!

Anyway, the tech put the scanner on my belly and began to take a look around at baby Muppet. And there was the baby, hunched over sleeping like a champ. The tech moved around some more and said, "Well I think you are going to be breaking with family tradition. You are having a baby girl." To which I squealed like a baby piglet (which I resemble right now) and began to cry. Baby, we are buying PINK! The tech continued on that this baby wasn't shy about letting us know she was a girl. I asked her if she was sure the baby was a girl and she said "Yes, I have no doubt that this baby is a girl."

Muppet, like at the NT scan, was an obstinate and uncooperative little baby. She wasn't moving, not even after being prodded, poked and pushed. After about an hour of the tech not being able to get all of the measurements she needed, stopped the ultrasound, and brought me some juice. Several minutes later, she came back and resumed the ultrasound. There again Muppet wasn't shy about letting us know she was a girl. In fact, the tech pointed out the girl parts and then moved on to take other measurements. We got to see an arm with her little fist balled up, we got to see her legs, and both feet, which I'm proud to say looked like it had 10 toes. We got to see her hands and finger bones and her 4 chamber heart beating away.

But the icing on the cake, other than finding out that Muppet was a girl, was seeing her beautiful little face. The tech switched over to 3D mode and coming face to face with a baby Chris and I have created, seeing that she was okay, and seeing that she is a she, well it just doesn't get any better than that!

Dreams

Just how prophetic are dreams? Are dreams just a way for our subconscious to work out our daily internal thoughts and struggles? What do they mean- or do they mean anything? As the days draw closer to Friday, I've noticed my dreams getting more vivid. Sometimes they are baby related and sometimes they aren't. Sometimes I dream that I drank a whole bottle of booze only to wake up in a sheer panic thinking that I did drink the booze and I've ruined baby Muppet. Is it because I want a glass of wine or is it because I'm so concerned about making sure Muppet has the best start possible to life and that this is my subconscious' way dealing with my concerns? One glass of wine with dinner isn't going to to hurt anything or anyone, but for me it almost sends me into the straight jacket.
Anyway- so last night I had a dream that I was delivering baby Muppet and low and behold the doctor picks him up shows me Muppet and said "Congratulations Mrs. Arnold, you have a boy. Is this God's way of saying- hey you're having a boy before the all important ultrasound? Is this God's way of telling me that we are going to have the very first Heisman Winner in the Arnold family? By the way, in case you were wondering- He'll be quarterbacking for the University of Tennessee! Is this God's way of preparing me for what's ahead? Or is this His way of saying baby Muppet isn't going to participate on Friday so I'm telling you now?

So just how prophetic are dreams? I guess we'll find out on Friday. All in all, no matter what Baby Muppet is, girl, boy- this baby will be the most loved, most doted on, and certainly the most cherished baby in all of the world! It really doesn't get any better than this.

Super Stomach Saturdays

Every Saturday Muppet turns another week old in gestation. So every Saturday, Chris and I are going to start posting pictures of my ever growing belly and it's getting pretty big I must say. This last Saturday Muppet turned 19 weeks old. We are almost half way there!!! Without further ado. . . .

18 Week Appointment and Old Wives Tales

I went in for my regular, monthly checkup on Friday. It was really nice to be able to hear the heartbeat, which was beating away in the 150's. This point brings me to a question and the validity of old wives tales. They, whoever "they" are, say that the faster the heartbeat, the more likely it's a girl, the slower, the more likely it's a boy. Okay, great, but ummm, what's fast and what's slow? So far Baby Muppet's heartbeats have been 125, 177, 168, and 150's. So are all of these above the line for a girl, or below the line for a boy and what's the magic line number?

What about the old wives tale about where you carry a child? Some say the lower you carry a baby, the more likely it's a boy, the higher the more likely a girl. What does this have to do with anything regarding the sex of the baby? I mean seriously, where in medical science can this be found? At least with the heartbeat tale, there is some truth that can be found. My friend Julie tells me that AFTER the baby is born, girls tend to have slightly higher heartbeats than boys.

What about the all important cravings test? So you're telling me if I crave sweets, it's bound to be a girl, but if I crave salty foods, it's a boy? Awesome, but I already have a sweet tooth, how exactly am I to determine if it's my sweet tooth that's the culprit instead of Muppet? What if Muppet really only likes chocolate chip cookies, I have figured it out- yep that's it. This is finally the excuse of the year, I'm sorry Dr. I know you said to gain only 25-30 pounds, but the baby MADE me put on an extra 20! Watch out Chips Ahoy, I'm coming to the grocery store, so stock up!

Finally, my all time favorite. You are supposed to pee in a cup and mix in some Drano (no unfortunately I'm not kidding). If it turns green, baby Muppet is a girl and if it's a boy you can expect some blue Drano. So let me get this straight, how exactly is your urine different if you are carrying a boy versus a girl. Don't you think that if this myth were true, that our enterprising pregnancy test makers would have already come up with a pee stick to determine at the time of a positive pregnancy test what sex you are having? If they came up with that test, they would make a lot of money. I would have already bought 3 or so by now.

All I have been able to determine is that these old wives tales are just that. . . tales, myths, non truths. They are all designed to make me wonder with anticipation and wait patiently until we get our ultrasound- which, yes, I know can be wrong or Muppet won't participate. Hopefully by March 13th, one week and 3 days from now, I'll be able to report whether we are Team Blue, Team Pink or Team Green (if the baby doesn't participate). Either way, God has given Chris and I a wonderful, miraculous, and astonishing blessing. It just doesn't get any better than this.

Follow Up to the Follow Up

Sounds like a Washington DC term right? Well I guess it sort of is. As a follow up test to my NT scan (the ultrasound), the maternal fetal medicine doctor took a boat load of blood in order to run various tests to check for genetic abnormalities. Well after a horrendous day at work, I almost forgot to call my doctor to get the results. I really hope this is not any indication of what kind of mother I'll be. I mean who forgets to call and get the results of their kids' tests? Well, apparently I do.
Anyway, so at 4 o'clock today, I finally remember to call to see if all is okay with Baby Muppet and 5 horribly long minutes later (I was beginning to expect some bad news), the nurse comes back on the phone and said "yep every thing's negative." Um great, thanks, all those years in Med School have finally paid off, I totally understood everything she said. Thanks for the clarification lady. So I politely asked, "Um so negative is good right?" "Yep" she squeaks out.
So all is well in Baby Muppet land. Perhaps next time, I won't forget to call about Muppet's blood tests. Perhaps I'll be a little more conscientious in the future.
Having the peace of mind that Baby Muppet is okay and all is well, well, it just doesn't get any better than that.

Only 3 more weeks.

Only 3 more weeks until we find out the sex of baby Muppet. Our appointment is on March 13th in the afternoon.



Which brings me to a question, how is it that people just "know" what you are having? I mean, take my mom for example, she calls Muppet "little MISS Muppet." How does mom KNOW it's a girl? Is it because she had a girl and is therefore says it by default? Is it becasue she has some super 6th sense or "Mommy intuition?" In her defense, she does say that Muppet could be a boy (she just thinks that Muppet is a girl) but is going to be thrilled with whatever Muppet is. How about my friends with boys, do they "know" it's going to be a boy?



I don't "know" anything or have any intution either way, is that going to make me a bad mom, and when will I develop "mother's intuition?" By the way, my cousin Ericka developed her's immediately. I think when Mason (her son) popped out, her's was already honed in. The reason I say so is becasue I must not have been more than 5 1/2 weeks along and I went to visit Mason in the hospital and she immediatly knew I was pregnant. How do you people do this?



Chris and I were discussing mother's intution and "knowing" if Muppet was a girl or boy. We were disucssing this at dinner Wednesday night- he took me to Olive Garden, such a sweet man. He doesn't have any clue either. He would also rather wait until the baby is born to find out the sex, but I've got to plan. I've got to plan whether to paint the nursery orange checkerboard or orange checkerboard, just kidding. I'd only paint the nursery orange checkerboard if Muppet is a boy or girl.



Anyway, in 3 weeks, we'll find out if we are buying pink or blue and how baby Muppet is progressing along. Seeing that baby on ultrasound, it can't be any better than that.

Follow Up Appointment to my NT Scan

After arriving home very late, and without Chris on Tuesday night following the family vacation, I had to get up Wednesday morning to go to a doctor's appointment. It was the follow up to the 12 week NT scan to see if there are any genetic abnormalities with baby Muppet. They took a boatload of blood and told me I'd get my results in a week. So, my prayer request, please pray that baby Muppet is a-okay.



This week, we are 16 weeks along, and hopefully Muppet is growing like a weed. I think I might have felt baby Muppet over the weekend in Denver, but I'm not sure. Only time will tell if it was just gas or the baby. But if it was baby Muppet, it just doesn't get any better than that!

Denver/ Family Ski Trip

Chris and I spent a nice relaxing President's Day weekend in Denver and Keystone Resort with Carla, Chad and Mary. On Saturday we went on a sleigh ride. It was so pretty, it was snowing and very cold. When we arrived at our destination, we stopped, took pictures, froze and drank what was supposed to be hot apple cider but turned out to be almost luke warm. But whatever, the mountains were there, the snow was falling and it was amazing.

While everyone went skiing on Sunday, I went to the spa. It was so relaxing and wonderful and coincidentally, my first prenatal massage. I was so pampered, I should really think about convincing Chris that I should have one of these every week. I got to drink lemon and cucumber infused water, which was so refreshing. The spa was set up like the mountain lodges you see on TV. It was one amazing experience. I also got my very first facial. Such a relaxing and pampering day.

Chris had a great time skiing and managed not to hurt his knees or fall, thank God for small favors. I guess I should explain, Chris and his brother Chad made a bet that whichever one fell first would have to ski down the mountain without a shirt. Step back ladies, he's all mine!!! The resort was heavenly, the mountains were majestic and the air was so clean.

We are back in DC, things are back to normal, and back to the daily grind of life. I'll post some pictures when I get them loaded off the camera. One thing I will say about Colorado, besides it being one of the most beautiful places on Earth, was that it was cold. I mean really really cold. Even bundling up, you still froze. Small sacrifices for the beauty that God has made. It doesn't get much better than that.

12 Weeks- almost out of the first trimester

During my 10 week appointment, Chris and I were able to hear the heartbeat of Baby Muppet. It was a strong 176 beats per minute. While we were there, the doctor asked if we would like to have some genetic screening done. Though, it wasn't necessary, it did come with an extra ultrasound and since Chris didn't get to see the first one, I thought this would be an amazing opportunity for Chris to see the baby.

2 weeks later we are in an ultrasound room waiting for the tech to start the process. Immediately baby Arnold came into view, what a relief, everything was a-okay! Except for one minor problem, the baby was asleep and wasn't cooperating. The tech needed to measure the width of the neck (it indicates the possibility of Downs Syndrome) and the baby wasn't having any of it. Baby Muppet didn't want to awaken from the deep slumber no matter how much the tech giggled my tummy, prodded my tummy and even pushed deeply on my tummy.

Finally the tech asked which one of us was stubborn. I quickly responded, Um that would be my husband Chris. He owns that trait, never mind the fact that stubborn happens to be my middle name too!

The tech, apparently realizing that baby Arnold wasn't going to cooperate and move around so she could finish her measurements, pulled my seat back up and made me complete a form and said we'd try again in a few minutes. Well, that must have been the straw that broke the camel's back. That really made the baby mad. When the tech reclined my chair, there was Baby Muppet kicking, punching and generally really angry that he/she had been woken up. It was really neat to see the baby moving around. I'm so glad that I wasn't able to feel the baby yet because all of Muppet's movements looked like it could have been really painful.

Seeing your baby move, kick (mad or not), and have a good strong heartbeat is amazing. Experiencing it with my husband, the love of my life, my biggest cheerleader was nothing short of magical. It just doesn't get any better than this.

6 weeks and 4 days

After several positive pregnancy tests and tears of joy later, I traipsed off to the doctor who ordered an ultrasound to not only date the pregnancy but to ensure this baby was sticking around. I scheduled the test for a week later. I didn't realize that when I made the appointment that Chris was going to be out of the country and wasn't going to be able to attend our first ultrasound. Fearing bad news (during those early weeks and months, I kept waiting for the proverbial other shoe to drop) I took my friend Patra along for moral support. Thanks Patra! It was amazing. The tech turned the screen around and there was the prettiest sight I had ever seen- a blob with a blinking dot in the middle. Houston- we have a heartbeat! It was the most beautiful 125 beats a minute that you've ever beheld. All I could think of is wow there's a baby in there. YIPPEEE! The tech dated the pregnancy at 6 weeks and 4 days- half way through my first trimester, only 6 more weeks and 3 days left to worry. . . or a lifetime whichever you prefer. Only 234 days left to go before baby Muppet makes his or her grand theatrical entrance. It doesn't get any better than this.

Haven't you heard, it's all about me!

After a rocky year of starts and stops, beginnings and endings, happiness and sadness, 2009 has begun with quite a bang. And boy, can I tell you how happy Chris and I are, and how truly blessed we feel?

In early July of 2008, we found out, through roughly 5 home pregnancy tests, we were expecting. I waited 3 full days to tell Chris so I could make extra sure, just one more positive pregnancy test please! When I finally figured out, it was in fact, true, I promptly went out and purchased a blue onesie for Chris that said "In my little world, bald is in." I thought how appropriate. I also wrote him a poem about how much I loved him, how much he meant to me and how he was going to be a daddy in March of 2009. It was one of the most magical moments I have ever experienced in my life, except for my wedding day, standing at the alter promising to love and cherish my best friend, my biggest cheerleader, and the love of my life, for my entire life. It really doesn't get any better than that.

Anyway, the gift was wrapped, the poem was written and I had instructions for Chris to read them out loud, fearful he wouldn't understand. Tears in my eyes, I waited anxiously for those last words of "and in March of 2009, you're going to be a daddy too." What was it someone said about Famous last words? Those came up to bite and pretty hard too.

I remember the day like it was yesterday, July 29th, I woke up with the worst pain I have ever experienced in my life. I doubled over in pain, praying that my intuition wasn't correct. But, that wasn't meant to be. Didn't anyone ever tell you. . women's intuition is always right?

Chris rushed me to the ER, thankfully before DC rush hour, where our worst fears were confirmed. We had a miscarriage. Our little peanut wasn't meant to be.

Buckets of tears, screams, sobs and emotional outbursts came flowing out. For weeks the sadness was overwhelming. There were good hours and bad hours, good days and bad, but I had to put one foot in front of the other and just keep walking. There is not a day that goes by that I don't think of that baby and hope that he/she is up in Heaven hanging out with all of our loves ones who have preceded us.

Sometimes, a change of pace, getting out town can help so much in the healing process. In late August, we took our annual vacation. We went to Mexico. We had the most wonderful time, the resort was amazing, the food fantastic, the beach beautiful, my mood buoyant, and my marriage right on track. I'll post some pictures. This resort was one of the best I've ever been to and it merits a return trip.

September and October passed uneventfully for us, which at that point, was a blessing. November, however, was not to be the same. Remember, women and their intuition? Well, I had it and in a big way. I drove myself to CVS where I purchased 2 boxes of home pregnancy tests- need a positive one please. And low and behold, God answered our prayers with a big, fat positive. Chris had just walked out of the house and down to the car when I called him and told him it was an emergency he needed to return right away. Instead of cute little onesies and cleverly crafted poems, all he got was a positive pee stick shoved in his face. It was a glorious day. Because it was so glorious, I decided to test the next day and the next, you know just to make sure, just doing my due diligence.

So here we are, after a year of ups and downs, positives and negatives, elation and depression, living our lives with a baby on the way. It doesn't get any better than this.